Welcome, brave shopper, to the financial abyss of Halloween Gear Sales. Below you’ll find the unholy methods by which you may exchange your worldly currency for our cursed commodities. Choose wisely – some payment options carry… unexpected consequences.
Accepted Forms of Tribute
We currently accept the following conventional (and not-so-conventional) payment methods:
Visa: The classic choice for those who prefer their transactions unhaunted (we make no promises).
MasterCard: Accepted worldwide, except in dimensions where the Old Ones hold sway.
JCB: For our international patrons who enjoy a side of mystery with their purchases.
PayPal: The safest way to pay if you’re concerned about spectral interference with your bank account.
Payment Methods We NO LONGER Accept
Due to recent… incidents… and legal constraints from various mortal authorities, we can no longer accept:
- Ancient coins (too many cursed ones in circulation)
- Souls (the paperwork became unbearable)
- First-born children (our lawyers insisted)
- Blood oaths (they kept manifesting literally)
- Haunted artifacts (too difficult to appraise)
Any attempt to pay with these methods will result in your order being automatically converted to Standard Haunt Express shipping at double the cost. You have been warned.
Security of Your Dark Transactions
Rest assured, your payment information is protected by:
- 256-bit encryption (standard mortal technology)
- A circle of salt around our servers
- Three (3) bound demons specifically trained in cybersecurity
- Regular exorcisms of our payment gateway
NOTE: While we take every precaution, we cannot be held responsible if your credit card develops a taste for human flesh after use on our site. This occurs in less than 0.001% of transactions and usually resolves itself within a lunar cycle.
Currency Conversion
All transactions are processed in GBP (£). Currency conversion is handled by your payment provider, though some customers report the amounts fluctuating based on:
- The phase of the moon
- Local paranormal activity levels
- How much the spirits like you
We recommend checking the conversion rate immediately before purchase, especially during the witching hour.
Payment Issues
Should you encounter any of the following, contact our necromantic support immediately:
- Your payment is processed but you hear disembodied laughter
- Your receipt appears written in blood (real or fake)
- Your confirmation email contains prophecies instead of an order number
- Your credit card develops eyes and blinks at you